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Entry Five: a summary of events from July 19 through July 24, 2004

Dearest Tour Diary:

The next city pinned on our map of rock conquest was Olympia. We entered the city in preparation to blast the population with full force wizard rock. We rocked Greta Pedersen's Love Nest with no mercy. Ikuko Nintendo This is Your Art opened the night with their own Harry Potter musical Cliff Notes. It was awesome and everyone was having a blast. Then, Jenny Jenkins, from the Encylcopedia of Fun, played some hilarious songs on her ukulele. Then it was time for the wizards to rock. It was a very fun show. Everyone was singing along. Some people drove all the way from Spokane to see us! WOW! The Sour Grapes even showed up at the show. They were playing with Japanther just down the street. NO WAY! They invited us to go see the rest of the show with them. It would have been totally awesome, but we had clean up the mess our rockage made and find a meal, something which we had postponed for quite some time. Jen offered to make us burritos. They were savory.

We ended up partying in Olympia all night long. Well, maybe until about one or two. Olympia was definitely one of my favourite places to party on this trip. After partying we drove up to Seattle and arrived somewhere around three in the morning. We woke up Brooke and Mike, fed them some drop, and they gave us a place to sleep. Z's filled the air.

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Still victorious in Olympia!

The following day, we got out of bed just as the Red Sox started to bat at the Mariners' stadium. We walked way downtown head towards the baseball game. It was a long walk. We stopped by the famous Seattle Public Library. It is famous for not letting Harry and the Potters play. Thanks to everyone who called up the library and emailed them demanding that they let us rock their library. It was a valiant effort but of no avail. A shame. We checked out the library anyway just to see what we were missing. It is definitely a cool looking library. I can see why they wouldn't want it rocked to pieces. It is very handsome for a building.

So we continued to the baseball stadium and when we arrived we tried several times to sneak past the guards and get in. The game was almost over. Why would the guards still monitor the entrances? A nice kid gave us some tickets to recycle. This was awesome. The tickets made getting in so much easier. We saw about an inning and a half of the game. It was sweet. The Sox won the game, but we didn't get to see it. We had to leave early to get to the rock show. We walked a few miles back to the Potter Mobile we drove to the University District.

We had a bowl of pho. That was some of the best soup we ever had. They gave us a bunch of stuff to add to the soup as our meal progressed, like mint and peppers, and bean sprouts. As time went on the flavor of the soup evolved into one of the most flavorful experiences ever embodied in a bowl.

Then we rocked the University of Washington Bookstore. It was amazing. The books were falling off the shelves because it was rocking so hard. The audience was totally awesome at this show. Everyone was digging the book rock. We got a video cassette of someone doing Gryffindor rocks for a talent show. We also got red sweaters with a "P" and "J" on them. They were not nice big sweaters though. They were nice petit sweaters. We also got a toilet seat. A Hogwarts Toilet Seat! I'm afraid to use it though. It might smudge. That show was so fun.

The next day we had to bust out of Seattle and head to Portland. When we got to the City of Trophies, we met up with our friend Amy, and our dear sister, Cathy. We ate sandwiches at the Cup N Saucer. I had a Rueben. But they didn't have any rye bread. So it was on wheat. They also used pastrami instead of corned beef. That was weird. I guess it wasn't really a Rueben at all. It was The Liar's Rueben.

We went to Powell's Bookstore: the largest independent bookstore in the world. It was amazing. They have books about everything, and cheap too! We could have spent days in that place. WOW!

Then we went to play a rock show in a basement. It was really cool. Basement shows are so fun. Totally punk rock. After our set we watched the Sour Grapes and Japanther play. They were both awesome and this show was so much fun. I love to have fun. Both of our glasses fell off during the angry song. We just rocked that hard! After the show we ate chocolate covered bees and went out for doughnuts. The trip to the donut shop proved dually productive for we got to eat doughnuts and we also landed a gig for the following night after our bike shop show. WOW. Best doughnut shop ever!

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Paul displays new talent in the field of auto-haircut

The next day, we hopped and skipped around town. We went to Powell's again, then we met up with Dawn Riddle (Her real name! We are not lying!) from the Sour Grapes and she took us to some awesome places. We went to a zine store and we got some cool stuff. We went to a record shop. It rocked. We went to the bike shop and scoped out the scene there. We went TO TOWN!

That night, we rocked the bike-shop of Veloshop. All the cool kids in Portland ride bikes. It's totally rad. The bike shop was packed with hipsters and crowded outside with hipsters as the Sour Grapes played their amazing set. The hipsters enjoyed.

The Pretty Boy Pottahs changed in the bathroom of the bikeshop to prepare for the rock that was about to ensue. After we emerged from the bathroom, our skin was ready to feel the unruly sweat of rock and roll. As the set went on it just got more and more rocking. "Voldemort Can't Stop the Rock" fought off the evil spirits and allowed everyone to achieve a state of rock-ecstasy. After this blissful state was achieved, it was as if the gods came down from the heavens themselves and began to rock harder than the humans, making them jealous. This is very rare, because humans, as mortals, have a terminal life. As a result they indulge. And indulging in rock is one of the things humans do best. The gods, being immortal, rarely indulge in such mortal pleasures, for they have eternity to enjoy themselves. So it was awesome when the gods came to rock in the bikeshop. Some of them even rode their bikes to the show!

The highlight of the set was an insane version of Save Ginny Weasely that featured our skipping CD of drum tracks alongside all 3 Sour Grapes (Nicole, Dawn, and Steve) singing backup!

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The Sour Grapes are an awesome band.

After the show we went down the street and played a much quieter set at Voodoo Doughnut. This doughnut shop is amazing. It opens at 10 at night and closes at 10 in the morning. The doughnuts are good too! We rocked on an eight-foot high stage on top of the bathroom. That's the second bathroom this tour that we have played in or on. There was an organ on top of the bathroom. It was the best sounding organ ever placed on top of a bathroom. The crowd went ba-zonkers. We played the griping song at the doughnut shop and did a very poor cover of the Sour Grapes' Harry Potter song. We played some other songs too.

After our bodies were bombarded with rock music and fried dough circles, we watched Wizard People Dear Reader at Dawn Riddle's House. Once again, we out partied our hostesses and departed from their sleepy eyes and teary goodbyes at 3 AM.

The next day, we took our new friend, Dave, out for hotdogs at Otto's Sausage Kitchen. They were nice and homemade. It reminded me of home back in Germany where every morning we would wake up above the sausage factory and have hotdogs for breakfast. How I miss home!

After the dogs, we journeyed northward once again, now in the company of our sister. Rock! This time the road, the wind, and our pirate compass had brought us to Steilacoom, Washington. Little Hand of the City played before us. They were really fun to listen to. They were most excellent. Then it was our turn to rock.

There were lots of screaming girls that made us feel like rockstars. That was cool. I think I'm going to have a hard time adjusting to going back to school. No one starts cheering when I turn in my homework.

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These girls were totally rocked.

People gave us lots of stuff at that show. We got doughnuts. Thanks KT and Ely! We also got a Ron rag doll. It looked very homemade. I forgot to ask if it was. It reminded me of home back in Germany where every morning we would wake up above a rag doll factory and eat them for breakfast. We also would have gotten a broomstick from the toilet girls, but it got swiped by some dude who apparently really wanted a broomstick. He probably has a really dusty floor. His house will be cleaner because of this rock show. Harry and the Potters help America clean its homes!

After the show we went to Seattle with our friends Brooke and Mike and the girls who gave us a toilet seat and got some milkshakes at Dick's. I prefer to call them frappes actually. While we enjoyed our frappes, a crazy man approached us and asked if we wanted to buy a balloon. We declined, so he gave us the balloon for free. I drew a smiley face on it, and the crazy man was happy.

Milk Shake Thugs---->>>

We went back to Brooke's house and wrote a song about her throwing up a bunch of cotton candy when she was eight years old. It sat in her trash barrel for days! AWESOME!

The next day we had the best breakfast ever at Paul's Place in the U district. I got to look at the University of Washington. The library is like a castle. I want to rock it.

It was then that we departed from the West Coast on one of Seattle's floating bridges. WOW!

I will miss you Pacific Northwest! You have a special place in my heart.

Number of Shows: 23
Number of Doughnuts: plenty
Number of Eggplant Parmesans: Zero (something needs to be done about this)

-Joe 07.27.04